I'm having a hard time this holiday season.  Maybe because of the fact that two years is still looming in the back of my head.  Maybe it's because of the fact that my cousin has lapped us twice in one year.  Maybe it's because the holidays seem to be mostly centered around children or the various Christmas cards with babies on Santa's lap we've gotten over the last couple of weeks.  Whatever it is, I've found it really hard to be thankful during Thanksgiving and am finding it even more hard to actually take in that Christmas is only 3 days away without crying.  

The funny thing is my year has actually been pretty amazing for the most part.  Until I realize that what's amazing in it is what's happened for all our friends and family and not us.  Most days I'm happy and I know that things will get better.  In whatever way they will.  But today, today just reminds me that there's no guarantee of that.  

Right now I'm supposed to be booking a hotel for a last minute night away Babe and I plan on taking next week. We're going from Vegas for a weekend to surprising my friend in Fresno who just had her baby.  Who wouldn't love both of those things?  Apparently me.  Because I'm dreading what I have to get through to make it to the other side, 50+ people and 5 new babies.  And the questions, the looks, the hums and haws that we're "trying but haven't had any luck".  All I can think is thank God I can drink right now.  Who knows, maybe I'll "accidentally" book a room in Vegas for earlier than planned.

There's no easy way to sum up our trip to the east coast.  What was expected to be a long 10 day vacation through Washington D.C., Gettysburg, PA and New York City was much more exciting than that.  We walked 75 miles to places like the Lincoln Memorial, US Capitol building, Gettysburg National Park, Arlington Cemetery, Time Square, Little Italy and Central Park.  My feet got blistery and hurt like hell but it truly was a once in a lifetime experience for us.

As I mentioned before, the D.C./Gettysburg leg of our trip was definitely for my husband and NY for me.  Surprisingly we both really enjoyed each others planning and were really gung ho about everything.  Much of the trip was expected but there were a few detours.  For example, due to a bad tour guide, we cut our Library of Congress trip short and added the National Archives.  When we noticed that Jennifer Hudson and Jessie J. were doing a sound check in the National Mall, we stopped to listen and sing along.  After finding out that our dinner location of choice was closed on Sundays, we drove to a little joint called Hank's Oyster Bar in Alexandria, VA.  In New York it was fun exploring places like Rockefeller Plaza and New York Public Library at the drop of a hat.

Here's just a couple of photos from our trip to share with you although they could never capture the sounds, smells and pride you get from being is such beautiful and historical places.  

I am having a blast this week. Our vacation just finished in DC and started in NYC and I couldn't be happier. 

After 6 days walking all over the place, we calculated that we've walked a total of 53 miles! Now that were in NY, the walking is less rushed and for me a whole lot more entertaining. Don't get me wrong, DC was incredible, but it was definitely more of Babe's thing. 

Now our dogs are resting as we settle in for an early night with warm almonds and a beer from Times Square. 

I'll update more when I get back and for now just leave you with this. 

DD

Procrastination is something I'm an expert at.  Don't get me wrong, I'm excellent at planning and prepping but procrastination is on a whole different level for me.  What does that mean you ask?  Well, it means that while I've washed and folded 6 loads of laundry, purchased all our toiletries and printed our itineraries for the trip, I've yet to pack one bit of it.  We leave in 2 days and all those items are strewn about the house in various shopping bags and baskets.  

That also means that until we fly out, there's no way I'm going to have time to do almost anything else.  Which is only slightly okay with me.  You see, our vacation isn't exactly the relaxing kind.  No hanging out on the beach with a tropical cocktail.  Instead we'll be waking up bright and early Saturday morning to take a tour of the White House.  I mean the White House!  How cool is that?  So I may complain about having no down time for the next 18 days (between vacation, work and weddings) but I'm beyond pumped for it.  

I have no real answer for where I've been the last week.  I only know that the time taken off wasn't entirely necessary, just nice to have.  It started with me coming home from Arizona feeling pretty lousy and having to go to the doctor to get checked out Monday.  Then going into work Tuesday and feeling even worse. Before I knew it, Wednesday and Thursday had gone and I didn't feel one ounce of regret for not posting.

Now that this week has begun I'm feeling the urge to write again.  I found that in doing so, I work out the kinks in my own mind before I spread my weirdness to others.  It's helped.

Arizona was a blast and yet it wasn't.  I have a hard time vacationing with my family.  Originally I thought it was my moms need for complete planning on traveling which may be part of it, but I find that the common denominator is me. First off, it's hard being on other peoples schedule for long periods of time.  It's also difficult when you have no means of deviating because you're not the driver.  And as I've mentioned before, I can't stand when people push you to do whatever it is that they want to do but don't offer the same consideration.  Basically I'm stubborn in the worst way. Couple all that with fitting in tight spaces with a preschooler and infant and you start to think they're the calm ones.

But we survived.  Barely.  My sister surprised my brother by coming with us with both nephews.  It was the first time his family has met little MKV after 3 months.  It was so sweet to see everyone's reaction when they saw each other for the first time.  It made for great photos.  We got to spend a lot of time with my brother and his family one last time before his temporary base assignment and move to AL.  He was in such a good mood which made it so awesome. My nephews had a blast playing with each other and my brother's son even asked if he could keep my sister's son at their house when we had to leave.  Those boys are a crack up.  It was great catching up with them and having a weekend devoted to family.  I'm so proud of my brother, the man, husband and dad he's become.  I don't think I've ever been more proud of him.  

Yesterday was a rough day here at work.  But instead of asking Babe if he wanted to go for margaritas, we decided to go to dinner and a movie.  We've been wanting to see Dawn of the Planet of the Apes and Purge: Anarchy for some time.  Since we didn't get to over the weekend and since Purge doesn't come out until tomorrow, we decided to watch Planet of the Apes last night and the midnight showing of Purge tonight.  

I'd watched the original PotA and really loved it, and its sequel was just as good.  The only two complaints I have about it are that it can seem boring since there's not a ton of dialogue while they follow the apes.  It's a legit complaint considering they're talking apes.  The second complaint was we were in quite possibly the most obnoxious movie theater ever.  To my left was a guy who apparently had another date because he literally checked his phone every 15-20 minutes.  I know because I could see the clock every time the light shone through his damn phone.  Then there was the family who brought a very talkative toddler.  Really?  There's a time and place to bring your kids to the movies. Anything that isn't rated G or PG or ends after they should be in bed should be off limits. Why do parents insist on bringing them?  Lastly there was a very boisterous family in front of us who talked to the screen the entire time.  And whenever they weren't talking about that, they had very loud conversations about other random topics.  I've only had one movie experience matching that when a woman brought her aging hard of hearing parents to see Sex in the City late so we had to sit elbow to elbow.  That one may just top last night simply for giant penises parading on the screen.

Tonight's should be good too, although I'm really dreading the lack of sleep.  I woke up early this morning to prep for lunch today.  Then tonight we're going to my brother-in-laws house before we head to the movies.  All this before I head to Surprise, Arizona to see my brother off before he deploys.  I have a couple of surprises of my own when I arrive.  But just in case my sister-in-law reads this, I'm going to wait to post about that until I get back.  

So yeah, this weekend should be pretty awesome.  

This weekend was such a blast.  Exhausting but oh so worth it.  It started out with me joining my sister and the boys for Friday morning swim class and errands.  The oldest one takes lessons at a local high school in preparation for him to hopefully join the swim team like his mom and dad.  He absolutely loves the pool and anything water related. Anytime he's at our house he needs to go swimming and is always trying to talk us into taking him to the beach. Afterwards I helped him with some of his schoolwork and then we grabbed a bite to eat at Guisado's, a local taco shop.  I had such a great time hanging out with all three of them, I was bummed to even go home.  Unfortunately battling L.A. traffic to the IE on a Friday night was going to be bad.

When I got home, Babe and I packed and crashed early to get an early start the next day.  Then bright and early Saturday morning, Babe and I left for our overnight in Vegas.  First off, the drive in watching the sunrise was gorgeous. I will trade sunsets for sunrises any day.  We arrived at our hotel a little after 8, too early to

check-in, catch the shuttle to the strip or wait by the pool.  We gambled a bit and walked around until it was finally time to catch a ride.  Earlier we had looked up reviews of local restaurants that sounded good but decided to choose one only after walking around for a while. We started Vegas the way you're supposed to, with a drink from Fat Tuesday's.  After stopping off at a few places we finally decided on Mastro's Ocean Club and made a reservation for 6:00.  Then we headed over to Planet Hollywood for a bite to eat and caught the shuttle back to the hotel for check-in.  Thankfully they had a room waiting for us a little early where we could take a nap and freshen up before our night on the town.

Both Babe and I crashed for a couple hours, with just enough time to take showers and get ready.  I don't know if it was the heat or the medication I'm on but I woke up with a splitting headache and an upset stomach.  By the time we arrived at the restaurant, the Tylonel I had taken finally started to kick in but it and the cab ride over heightened my stomachache to full blown nausea. Babe ordered us a bottle of Shiraz, my favorite wine, which I was reluctant to drink with everything I was feeling. Then we ordered the sea bass for him and the halibut for me.  Both were a-mazing!  Before I was even halfway done though, I had run to the restroom 3 times thinking I was going to hurl.  The waiter felt bad and offered to box the rest and even give us the rest of the wine to go.  Sadly we couldn't since we wouldn't be back at the hotel for quite some time.  

Luckily for me, there was a CVS right outside of the Aria where we ate.  I chewed on some Pepto tablets which very quickly eased my stomach for the rest of the night.  Why didn't I get some before dinner?!  I'm still thinking about the halibut I couldn't finish.  Thankfully I was able to enjoy all of the Blue Man Group and even had enough energy do gamble afterwards.  The next morning we woke up early enough to beat the traffic again and headed home.  We even arrived early enough to spend some relaxing time in the pool and nap some more.  

I'm so grateful for my husbands willingness to take on adventures like this one.  We both had a great time trying things we never had in Vegas.  We're already planning our next trip.  

It's been decided.  And more importantly, booked.  This weekend we're going to Vegas!  I know we've been there about a million times.  In fact in our first years of datinghood, we went at least twice a year.  Both babe and I are gamblers and drinkers so we've always found common ground going to a place we both enjoy.  But up until recently, we'd always done only that.  The last couple trips however, we've ventured into hotels that weren't right on the strip and watched shows we never thought to do before.  It tends to break up the monotony.  

This trip is satisfying A) a need to get away from work and other daily life drama B) the spontaneity I know we can muster C) our craving to actually visit Vegas for something other than gambling.  We booked a room at the Rio after nearly everything else has skyrocketed, which is a first for us.  Then Babe found us two tickets to The Blue Man Group on GoldStar.  The only other thing to do is pick a kick ass restaurant in which to indulge.  So far, FB peeps have suggested a wrist band to eat at all the buffets, Caesar's Bacchanal Buffet, Hash House A Go-Go and Hugo's Cellar.  I'm not too certain I want to do a buffet, but I guess we can figure that all out later.

The short of it is, WE'RE GOING TO VEGAS IN 2 DAYS!!!

So last night Babe and I finally unloaded our beautiful little joyride, a cruiser with 650cc's.  We purchased it new three years ago and rode it on and of for the first two years.  But after laying it down twice, I became more and more unsure of riding it by myself.  Since I could never fully master riding bitch without a sissy bar, we decided to garage it last year and eventually put it up for sale.  After about 6 months of posting online ads and leaving it in the driveway with a for sale sign, we finally got one bite that actually ended up paying off.  After a long evening, we said goodbye and washed our hands of it.

Before it was even sold, we'd talked about what we should do with the extra cash.  We knew most of it would go to savings but wondered how much of it we should play with and at what.  Since we've been in dire need of an adventure by ourselves, I suggested we take a weekend getaway.  Babe actually agreed and of course asked that I put together a list.  This time I made him promise that a decision could be made tonight of where we're going.  Now I just need to put stuff together that I think he'd actually like.  

I'm a little frustrated today but I'm trying to bite my tongue and save myself a battle.  Last night Babe and I had a long discussion about some mutual friends that I don't particularly enjoy hanging out with.  There are a few reasons I would rather make plans with another group which I won't get into a lot of detail about here.  Most of them are legit while I know others are childish complaints like them only ever going out where and when they want to.  Anyway, I still genuinely feel my reasons are valid and that they should be taken into consideration when making plans.  Lately however, as I've grown to dislike these outings more and more, Babe is pushing them harder and harder. He's wanted to do almost everything with them.  I'm at the point where I'm asking if he could just make the plans to not include me which he thinks, and I agree might be awkward.  I just wish we could find a happy medium and not spend every waking moment with them.  

It doesn't help that I'm also pretty peeved that our fourth of July plans have fallen through.  This year I really wanted to swap the personal firework show our friends put on with a trip somewhere.  In May I started to bring up the idea and at Babe's request even put together a list of places, prices and schedules.  We finally narrowed it down to Big Bear and San Diego.  Both were reasonably priced and only required a one night stay...back in May at least.  I finally got him to decide on San Diego and we decided to make the offer to his brother's family.  Well, his brother is understandably busy with a toddler and infant and after 2 weeks still hasn't made a decision.  Last night I finally told Babe that I was just going to book and let them know where we were staying.  Only now there are fewer local hotels available and the rates are almost twice what they were.  So that leaves us with staying home for the weekend and piddling around the house like we do.  I'm a little disappointed that we couldn't get this off the ground sooner. Hopefully next year it won't be so difficult.  

I don't have much to say today other than I finally turned my charts into digital versions using Ovagraph Fertility Friend. That way I can at least refer to them wherever I'm at.  The basal body temperatures have been added to the tab above titled "Charts", obviously.  The rest is unimportant to the internet so I'll keep that private.

Yesterday I officially started my period and it's back with a vengeance.  I'm now almost positive the last cycle resulted in a chemical pregnancy.  The doctor still hasn't called me back from Monday so I'll probably follow up again today. That's not too soon right?

This morning I got the great news that my friend B is definitely pregnant with her first baby.  Words cannot express how relieved I am that they're both healthy.  She and her husband are going to make great parents.  This means though I'm going to be making a trip to her baby shower up North this year.  Bummer J.

Apparently I bitched so much about spending our vacation on the sandy beaches in Mexico that my husband actually agreed!  Unfortunately I soon realized that he would be so worried about our safety the whole time that he wouldn't have time to relax and enjoy himself.  So instead we figured out a trip that would make both of us happy, Washington, D.C. to New York, NY!  

We're going for 10 days beginning in Washington, taking a day trip to Gettysburg and then riding the Amtrak up to New York.  I've managed to book all the flights, car for Gettysburg, train to New York and hotels. So now all the working pieces are in order and all we have to do is wait.  Problem is I was efficient enough to plan enough in advance but now I'm impatient and wish the trip was coming up.  Unfortunately we have to wait until November.  

Now that we're planning though, I'm getting super excited about DC and Gettysburg too.  And I think Babe is getting excited about NY, which he's never had any interest in visiting.  As planned as we are, the thrill of spontaneity always makes our vacations more exciting.  We know how and when we're getting around but other than that, nothing else is planned.  There's going to be a lot to see in such a short amount of time but I'm excited I get to experience it all for the first time with my best friend.  He's definitely the best part of all these trips.  

If anyone is reading this, I'd love suggestions on great places to visit that aren't the tourist hot spots. Something off the beaten path that would make our trip that much more enjoyable.